Monkey Bars Are Evil

Oh man...what a tough day. I was sitting in my office getting ready to meet with someone when Deb (my wife) called and I could hear my daughter crying in the background. She went to the park after school and was playing on the monkey bars when disaster struck. The bottom line...a broken arm. She fractured the humerus bone (hey, it's not funny!) just above her elbow but fortunately a simple cast for 6 weeks will do the trick. Interesting...every nurse and doctor at the ER commented on how monkey bars are probably the number one source of injuries for children (next was bikes and trampolines).

The whole saga brought back some childhood memories as I thought back to the time I jumped out of tree while playing tag with my brothers. I was determined not to let my little brother tag me so I lured him up the tree a little further planning to jump about 12 feet to the ground and escape his grubby little tag-happy fingers! Turns out I miscalculated the jump a bit and caught my foot on a little branch as I shoved away from the main limb. As my toe hung up on the branch, my head went from being the highest point on my body to being the first thing to hit the ground. I tried to break my fall with my hands and arms but that just caused me to break my wrist just before being knocked unconscious.

As I think back to that and many other physical traumas I experienced as a kid it doesn't seem too bad of an experience. But to be a dad and have your little girl get banged up and subjected to potentially serious injuries?! Makes me want to vomit.

See You At The Poll

I know...I misspelled "pole" but it was intentional. This annual event which draws students to their school flagpoles for prayer every September is quite a good thing...on the surface. But what I'm wondering this morning (as I wait to attend a rally due to a 2-hr school delay) is what the majority of students at the high schools and middle schools think about this event. One of the points made in a good book I'm reading about 7 Effective Practices of Ministry is that you need to look at your church, ministry, or organization through the eyes of an outsider. In youth ministry, that's the majority of each school's student population.

So if we were to take a poll...regarding this pole-praying-practice...would we find the opinions of 'insiders' vs. 'outsiders' to be extremely polarized??

I think so. I'm not saying that See You At The Pole is a bad thing...or that students shouldn't gather for this annual prayer event. But it's just an event. I'd rather see ten students living out the values and lifestyle of Christ than two hundred praying at a flagpole. Again, I'm not trying to be cynical about a valuable expression of Christian devotion in the lives of students. I just don't think the third Wednesday in September is any more crucial for students to live out their faith than the second or fourth Wednesday of any other month.

Neighborhood Integrity

So...we recently gave up the autonomy of living on a half-acre of land with our single-family dwelling place. For the time being, we're squeezing the human and material contents of our previous home into a nice little apartment with a nice little pond a few nice little feathered friends who wander past the sliding glass door on occasion.

But with the benefits of living in close community come the drawbacks as well. One of the most irritating things we deal with on a daily basis is the inability of our neighbors to park efficiently between those spacious white lines. I really am kind of baffled as I drive through the neighborhood and see how haphazardly people park their vehicles. I think I'll suggest that management institute a fine for any vehicle parked over a white line!

Sadder still is the fact that we only lived here for two short weeks before we fell victim to the reckless parking lot navigation efforts of a neighbor. As Deb got out of the car with the kids the other day she recognized something was up when a whole piece of fiberglass panel fell to the ground from one of the rear doors. What we discovered was that the car had been substantially bumped by another vehicle enough to dent the door and bust the connectors which held the panel in place. Now a week later...after having no one confess to the incident...I found the culprit. The light teal paint of our Bonneville is smeared all over the front right fender of our neighbor's Kia Spectra. I can't believe it?! How could run into your neighbor's car, who you're going to see repeatedly and park next to for at least 12 months, and not 'fess up to it?! It's almost funny...if not for the total lack of integrity.

So what do I do? Turn in the license plate number? Put up a note by our mailboxes? Let it go? It's not that I even care about the cost of repair or want to get compensated. I just want to have neighbors with some integrity. Is that why most people in the church don't want to give up their private personal relationship with Jesus for a community-based pursuit of God together? Because the awareness of integrity-loss increases greatly within community. By the way...since the car is paid off...I think I'll just take some liquid nails and slap that piece back in place. That should last a little longer than duct tape, eh?!

The Church's Batting Average

I'm reading a good book right now entitled 7 Practices of Effective Ministry by Andy Stanley and two others from his team at Northpoint church near Atlanta. Over the past few months, I've had several people recommend some of his writing to me, but this is the first one I've dipped into.

One of the things I like so far is the emphasis being placed on relationships and steps rather than programs and events. As I step back up to the plate of youth ministry (Stanley uses some good baseball imagery in the book!) I find myself kicking the dirt around a bit and tapping my bat on the ground establishing my familiarity with home plate. But what is home plate in youth ministry? or in ministry in general? What does it mean to hit a home run?

I suppose that in any kind of ministry setting or even just in our spiritual lives...home plate is a mature relationship (or I should probably say a maturing relationship) with Christ. Scoring a run in this context is helping someone move into ever-increasing Christ likeness. But in order to accomplish that goal, we've got to move people (or ourselves) through a series of steps which lead to that end. Unfortunately, what I've been a part of in most of my years of ministry (which is what I think Stanley is suggesting in his book) is just continual efforts to swing away and assume that any contact made with the ball is a win. But the only hit that counts towards improving the batting average is one which results in advancing someone to first base and beyond.

So we can crank one out of the park (like pulling off a great worship service or event) but if we don't help someone advance towards home plate (spiritual maturity) then we've definitely not accomplished our main goal. My concern and my insecurity right now has a lot to do with the gravitational pull I sense drawing me into a program-driven approach to ministry when I know the focus needs to be on steps, practices, and relationships instead.

LOST AGAIN

No...I'm not talking about the Ohio State Buckeyes...though that was a depressing loss for me (since I now work with a Texan who can be heard shouting "Hook'em Horns" down the hall). I'm not talking about Agassi's loss to Roger Federer today at the US Open either. Although I was really rooting for the old guy to pull it off (Andre is 35 and I'm almost 35. As I get older I find myself cheering on the more 'mature' athletes!)

Anyway...I got lost on my bike again this past Saturday. I should admit though that I don't really mind it. Really I should just call it "exploring" and not getting lost. I like to hop on the bike and just head in a particular direction. The problem is that I have this sense of what the roads should do in my mind. But often roads are not laid out in a logical grid-like way...so that's what throws me off. But this is the second time I've gone "exploring" on this one particular road. And on Saturday I just kept making the wrong decision when I had a chance to take a turn. My wife makes fun of me because in those situations I have a "feeling" about whether I'm headed in the right direction or not. And although I would "feel" like the decision was right...it took me further from where I wanted to be.

Finally I noticed that the sun was setting and the thought occurred to me to just head south...I knew that would take me to familiar territory. So as I looked to the sun...I was able to figure out my next move and finally came across the road I was looking for. My legs were starting to resist the commands to keep pumping at a steady pace, but as I churned along (now with confidence in my location) I thought of the spiritual implications and analogy. Aren't there times when we makes decisions based on what "feels" right? I know I do. And the frustration that sets in after making the wrong choices over and over...that gets downright maddening. But when I settle down and look up...(not just up directionally, but up spiritually)...I look to the Son and get my bearings. Then things become clear again. I love clarity!

BLOG Balance

I think I will try to create another blog or two so I can keep a certain focus here. I'm tempted to start blogging about things which pertain more to youth ministry or that connect with the students I'll be sharing life with. But I actually want to keep this blog focused more on the personal journey...the inward and upward journeys.

To my surprise, this blog has launched or re-launched many old friendships and relationships. That has been very meaningful to me. I hope to continue those conversations and start many more in the days ahead.

But balance has always been a problem for me. And being back in a fairly traditional context of ministry adds many demands and expectations. The key for me is to hold steady on my non negotiable values of life and ministry. Regardless of job security, people-pleasing, or performance issues...I have to keep my eyes on those compass points. Have any of you stumbled across some significant strategies for maintaining balance in ministry...or life in general?? (it can be just as hard or harder outside of ministry I learned)

Daddy Daughter Distress

For the past couple of weeks, we've really been nervous about this whole move and transition from the angle of my daughter starting 1st grade at a completely new and public school. Well...the four of us walked into her new school this morning (at 7:30am!!) and only three walked out. Actually...my youngest was on my shoulders and pretty sleepy/grumpy so she didn't do much walking. But we left daughter number one in a class full of strangers with a strange teacher, a strange teacher's aid, and hundreds of other strangers in the building as well.

So I came home from work early to check in with the family and get a first-hand report on the experience.

Are
you
wondering
how
it
went?

Are
you
anticipating
the
rest
of
this story??

Well...she loved it! Even the food was good...so daddy's (my) distress has been mostly resolved.
Soon I'll be taking her to her first dance and then paying for a prom dress! I'm going to need some counseling soon.

Chris

Salute to a friend

So I'm breaking the blog silence with a salute to perhaps my best friend on the planet. I think it becomes very evident where you have or haven't invested your relational capital during a time of crisis or great need. Having just passed through one of the most physically demanding weeks of my life...all my rhetoric about community has been put to the test. As it turns out...I've talked alot about community over the past year or so...but haven't really developed much of it. A great lesson has been learned...the hard way as usual.

So to my lifelong buddy (only 8 years now but it will be 58 years by the time I bust out of this clay jar)...Chappy...again I say..."Thanks!" I literally could not have made it through the past week without you. Makes me want to sing some song about Snoopy and Charlie, Batman & Robin, etc, etc :-)