A Week of Blog-lessness

Since I'll be packing up all our earthly belongings and getting the house ready to sell...I must bid a fond farewell to the blog for about a week. Stay tuned for a recap of the relocation saga sometime in September.

Blessings,

Chris

Golfing: Friend or Foe?

I got to enjoy a beautiful morning while hacking out of a few sandtraps today. In celebration of a friend's birthday, we gathered early this morning at a nice course. It was an absolutely perfect day for golf even though my game was perfectly dreadful...especially the putting. My tee shots and mid-irons were all pretty good. Chipped it close a few times, but I couldn't sink a putt for anything. It has been quite awhile since I've played a round of golf. The fellowship and weather was terrific...but I'm not going to start sneaking back out to the course anytime soon...not when I can take that 3-4 hours and ride 60 miles...for free!

I had an interesting experience/observation yesterday while reading a good book. I was at the Easton outdoor mall which is just about 10 minutes from our house. They have built a very nice quad-type area with a fountain which provides a nice park-like setting with benches right in the middle of all the restraunts and shops. As I was sitting on a bench reading some Brian McLaren...several children were squealing, jumping, and running through the fountain area. It must have some sort of random setting which causes various spouts to shoot water about six or eight feet into the air. These kids were running from side to side across the spray zone trying to outwit the water and avoid the cool refreshing eruptions.

At one point, I got totally distracted from my reading while listening to the unihibited joy being displayed for all to see by these children. A group of about ten little kids were enjoying the fountain with a group of about 50 or so individuals walking by or sitting at a nearby outdoor cafe or seated at the other benches around the square. I thought of Jesus' words when He said that the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to such as these. When was the last time I just bathed in the joy of laughter or frivolity? When did I last abandon myself to completely enjoying the company of others? of my children? of God in worship?

After a few minutes of reflection I tuned the laughter out and returned to my book...and my inhibited formal style of being. But something in me longed to throw the book down and jump in the water with those kids! I wish I had been that courageous!

Chicago Tribunal

I have this obsessive need to alliterate and play on words. We just returned from Chicago at 4:43a.m. this morning and the "tribunal" I'm referring to was actually a very laid back and congenial interview process with an exciting church in need of some youth ministry leadership. But Chicago is intense! The traffic when we were driving towards the Sears Tower around midnight Saturday evening was thicker than rush hour in Columbus on Friday mornings. And just driving around the burbs to find a spot for dinner took about 30 mintues to travel 10 miles. Crazy!

But what an exciting place to live and brush up against a myriad of cultures and peoples. Plus there was no shortage of Starbucks!

The issues which are creating confusion for us are many: distance from family, ministry vision, leadership potential, future growth opportunities...personal, career, and family..., financial considerations, school for Jess, housing options, cost of living, proximity to the Appalachian Trail (just kidding on that one). But the list could go on.

I feel intense pressure to completely tune into the voice of the heart. Where are we being tugged and nudged by the Spirit? Could you help us pray for clarity?! Thank you!

Chris

Much Brewing Over Starbucks

My brother just sent me an interesting article with some harsh criticism of Starbucks. Since I've been a Starbucks Partner (employee) for almost a couple of years now...I've had to field a lot of questions about my affiliation with the liberal purveyor of lattes. Here's a link http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=45694o the article which I think is a good call for discernment.

Without doing a great deal of research on it however...I can assure you that Starbucks does not hate children anymore than the Catholic Church hates children (which has been much more responsible for damage to children than Starbucks.) Starbucks does a great deal in the local communities as well as in the global communities to demonstrate otherwise. Just to name a few things I've been involved in personally...Starbucks collects toys for seriously (terminally) ill children around the holidays, sponsors kid-friendly events which raise money for environmental and social causes, and puts millions of dollars towards literacy campaigns for children. (Unfortunately, I'm not being paid to defend Starbucks) Although my Starbucks journey is practically over...I do take great PRIDE in the company and most of the values which they promote.

Now, having said that...I don't agree with any support which Starbucks is giving to the Gay and Lesbian agenda, Planned Parenthood, or any other groups which work against what I would hold to be biblical family values. (Why not support heterosexual and monogamous relationship oriented events which would bolster the success of marriage and family--a value held by many Starbucks customers?) But I do not consider the gay & lesbian community to be the cesspool of moral deprivation which most conservative evangelical Christians do. I have met some homosexual individuals during my journey with Starbucks who are closer to the Kingdom than many heterosexual hypocrites I've been going to church with for years! I believe the church is so full of sin that uniting against the "big" sin of homosexuality provides some kind of anesthetic arrogance which gives the deceptive sensation of enjoying God's favor and grace.

Before I get carried away any further, let me just say that if you're looking for dirt you'll find it. One problem I have with Meghan Kleppinger's article is that she (and most Christians) miss the economic injustice and social injustice which is a far greater problem in God's eyes (read the prophets). Don't think in terms of the $4,000 given to the irresponsible Coffee Corporation...but think in terms of the irresponsible Christian who has spent at least $4,000 in luxuries without being concerned about starving children or aids-infected babies or whatever?! That's the kind of Kingdom stuff Jesus might be more concerned with in this whole debate.

So yes...I will continue to purchase and consume Starbucks' beverages. Kleppinger's article and her lifestyle choice is one to be respected though. I can certainly appreciate someone who is willing to take a stand somewhere...whether or not I stand beside them.

Catalyzing Community

That's the phrase I used in a philosophy of youth ministry which I just hammered out. Ministry ought to have a significant emphasis on building authentic community and developing relationships within the body of Christ...relationships which contribute to spiritual transformation.

But then the question came at me..."What does that look like in the life of middle school student?" And I thought to myself...that's a great question!

For the past couple of years in seminary, Starbucks, and ministry (what a combination)...I've been processing all kinds of stuff which has led me to some seemingly great conclusions in my own life about community, intimacy with God, suffering, reconciliation, and more. Now comes the difficult task of translating these truths into meaningful and practical terms for students. With confidence I'll move towards that goal...but it's just not the kind of stuff that's easy to explain in one sentence or less. I want to say to people what Christ said...just come follow me...we'll learn together. I'm sure of the destination...which is the journey itself.

The Starbucks Journey Terminus

It could be that I'm taking my last lunch break from Starbucks this evening. I've said for the past few months that I couldn't see myself ever totally leaving Starbucks as an employee. My plan was to settle in somewhere new and find a nearby 'bux to just kick a shift or two per week at. But the journey might end after all. Now for the dilemma of paying full price (or paying anything for that matter) for my coffee.

A third interview is in my near future for deciding our next church home for awhile. I can do nothing but trust in the Lord with all my heart...and acknowledge God every moment...and pray that the path becomes clear to all. Please pray that we make decisions in the Spirit over the next week or so. Thank you!

More Soul Space

I've been packing up my books at home...which has turned into a monumental project. I really have too many books. But anyway...it's fun to come across titles which I've previously read and reflect on their impact on my life. One book in particular which caught my attention (as I packed up the box labeled spiritual formation) was Soul Space by Jerome Daily. It was one of the books I was reading or had just read when I started this blog last year. The concept is simple and has to do with the need for simplicity. Our souls become cluttered in much the same way that the peripheral spaces of our homes become cluttered. It takes constant effort to maintain uncluttered living space in the deep places of our souls. Because the spiritual interior of our lives is not visible to the typical bystander, church acquaintance, or even some family members...it is so important that we take time to reflect and submit our souls to God's transforming gaze. For me...that's the pursuit of holiness. The sanctification of our hearts, minds, and wills is a setting-apart-act which is performed on us as we position ourselves in postures of yieldedness to God. I don't DO anything to get holy. I just position myself to get closer to the sanctfier...the holy presence...the transforming Spirit of God which nourishes my soul like a steady rain after a long unquenchable dryness.

When you're positioned for transformation and the awareness of grace seems intensified, it's a wonderful time...even in the midst of trial or suffering...because God's presence in adversity is better than even the best of circumstances without that awareness.

Numb from Waiting

One of the most paralyzing situations I've ever experienced is waiting. Not my cup of tea!

Preference vs. Presence

First let me share an update on our journey of interviewing and searching for a new home church... We had a very informal but effective time of dialogue (interview) last night with a great team of church leaders. The setting was unusual in that we went to the pastor's home for dinner along with about 10 or 12 individuals serving as ministry leaders. As much as an interview could be, it was comfortable and informative. I think I got a feel for the vision of the church, some recent history, and perceived strengths. Many of the typical questions were launched towards me and I tried not to just regurgitate the 'right answers' but to use them as opportunities to share my values and non-negotiables in ministry. Although I'm sure the groups who have been interviewing with us perceive themselves as the interview-ers...I'm quite sure we've entered the process perceiving it the other way around. And so far...we've exerted some form of control over this process...but now that we've encountered a situation which seems to have God all over it...and just about every issue of vision, resources, spiritual authenticity, etc is in place...now we submit to the situation and pray for God to bring clarity!

Now for the part of this post which actually connects with the title...

I was invited to speak at a men's prayer breakfast this morning on the topic of worship and challenging men to encounter God in deeper ways (which applies to both genders actually). As I was preparing to speak and share this week, I kept hitting a "wall" because I was looking for something profound to say...from the latest book or worship guru. Finally the Spirit urged me to share the things I have personally been learning about worship lately.

I could sum that journey up in a couple of trite (yet meaningful) phrases. Worship is not about 'preference' (i.e. the style of worship that appeals to me) but about 'presence.' Worship is a response to God's presence...not just His presence in a building while music is playing and hands are being lifted...but His presence which can be celebrated daily in the 'jars of clay' in Spirit and in Truth (John 4). Worship is also about the daily cultivation of relational intimacy and passion for God. It's not about obligatory spiritual performance.

My Girls to the Rescue

My ride yesterday should've been about 50 or 60 miles...if I had finished it! I had not been eating healthy for the past few days or even been on the bike in over a week due to that bad spoke. So I should have done 20 to 30 miles. As is my usual custom though...I bit off more than I could chew and called Deb and the girls in as my "lag" vehicle. I had left a voice message at home with pain in my voice and being out of breath. Jess heard and asked Deb, "Is daddy okay??" She got a kick out of coming to my rescue as I heaved the bike into the trunk of the car.

Ooops...lunch break is over at Starbucks. Just a few more days.

Big interview Friday evening...if you're the praying type...please throw one up for us!

Blessings.

Cycling Sycophant

Cycling: the act of riding a cycle..i.e. bicycle

Sycophant: a servile self-seeking flatterer (synonym: parasite)

I think the connotation of 'sycophant' is rather negative, so I don't think it's an accurate representation of me personally...but the phrase came to mind and sounded cool in my head.

But I am all about the bike today. Just dropped it off next door at BikeSource with my buddy Kurt who is going to replace my damaged spoke and get me ready for a 40 or 50 mile ride today. I've only been on the bike once since RAIN (ride across Indiana) where I broke the spoke originally. Then while I was near Canton speaking at their youth camp, I rode into Alliance, OH and broke what I think to be the same spoke. It's not the actual spoke which is breaking...but the piece which connects it to the wheel. I'm trying to avoid replacing the whole wheel.

During this spiritual 'stage ride' of ministry transition...some time on the bike is good medicine. Just my face against the wind...and my legs against the lactic acid! And hopefully God will speak as I put my trust in another spoke.

Birthday Blitz

My daughter Jessica just turned 6. She'll be in 1st grade in just a few weeks. Unfathomable!!

Anyway...we've stretched out the birthday celebration for a little over a week celebrating with various circles of friends and family. It has been alot of fun...much more fun than any birthdays I remember as a kid. Makes me wonder if we're spoiling our girls?! They certainly have too much STUFF! I know we're not teaching them live counter-culturally when it comes to material possessions. Of course, that has to be modeled from the top down, right?

As far as the celebrating goes however...I definitely don't mind erring on the side of emotional indulgence. I guess we'll find out how we did in about twenty years...when she is or is not in need of counseling.

But...what a blessing...these beautiful daughters of mine! I better get back home to read books with them...

Confession Is Good For the Soul Mate

I recently confessed to my wife that I was being a pretty crappy husband lately. I could produce a list of pretty good excuses, but the truth remains. And confession may be good for the soul...but I'm not sure what it does for the soul-mate. Because I had nothing to offer except the confession. I honestly cannot pinpoint the reason I'm being an occasional insensetive dweeb of a spouse. And I can't honestly claim that the condition is going to immediately improve.

I suppose the benefit was just in exposing the ugliness. And the confession did evoke a response of something like..."well, I'm glad it's not just me." Which I interpret to mean that she knew I was the one being a jerk...but just needed confirmation from the horse's mouth. Actually, I do feel a sense of relief that I've admitted my marital malice and I can stop this pretentious act that all my little irritations are a result of some fault and flaw in my wife. Deb is not the perfect spouse, by her own admission, but she's alot closer than I sometimes give her credit for.

And interestingly enough...our 11th anniversary was this past weekend! Maybe anniversaries are a natural time for relational repairs.

The BLOG of Life

Certainly I don't want to exalt blogging to some form of divinely inspired newly dispensed canon of Scripture, but...after catching up on some blogs out there and connecting with some new ones...I AM inspired. The Spirit is stirring in many ways and many locations. And so many are taking the exit ramp off of mainstream bankrupt Christianity and finding some healthy detours up the Mountain of God! It's a tough climb but the view is getting more incredible each day.

Something disturbed me though as my browser collided with a blog of ministry despair. Some ex-youth pastors were lamenting the woes of previous ministries and celebrating their freedom from the politics and pretense of church. While I know exactly what they've been through (after 10 years of youth ministry) I have this sense of sadness. Maybe it's because after a year away from all that craphole context of ministry...I'm going back. I fear that I may be unable to sustain this emergent postmodern approach (whatever you want to call it) to following Jesus.

But what I really fear is a world of youth pastors and young church leaders who will walk away from church without the willingness to sacrifice their lives on the front lines of a revolution. I don't want to die anymore than the next schmuck...but who's going to keep this culturally irrelevant brand of Christianity from being passed to another generation?!

Fishing & Fasting

Actually, I have discovered that these two disciplines (yes, fishing is a spiritual discipline) go quite well together. As long as you don't take food with you in the boat...and as long as you're commited to not eating raw fish...the relationship is complimentary.

So I set out on a mission yesterday with the canoe strapped to the top of my Ford Focus and a hunger to encounter God. There's just something spiritual and therapeutic about sitting out on a fairly large body of water with the wind as the dominant force being applied to your vessel. (I very much envy those on the sailboats as I'm paddling my obliques off!) As I sat back against the center seat of my canoe and soaked in the Son...I sensed confirmation in the direction that our family is heading. I was also able to finalize a "no" for one particular ministry context which had become available to us. Besides that, I caught about ten little half-pound bass and one that about two pounds or so. With my light pole and light test line...it was a lot of fun to bring that fiesty one in.

Well, today I'm off to further a conversation which might lead us to a great healthy and exciting church...or it may just sharpen my focus towards a specific model of youth ministry which I'm growing more and more passionate about. Regardless...I'm just so grateful that God is giving us/me patience with this process and providing just enough guidance for each day.

Searching Saga

So...I hit a little snag this weekend with my future career in ministry. Actually, it has resulted in a helpful process of re-defining and clarity. But I walked away from an interview completely confused about whether I would ever really "fit" again in a church staff ministry context. I found myself wanting to jump back into the friendly world of Starbucks management where expectations are clearly defined and pretty easy to achieve. But as the day wore on...my self-talk (and God-talk) lifted me out of that despair and a perfectly timed phone call from Virginia encouraged me immensely! There ARE churches out there (and pastors) who can almost perfectly articulate my angst and passion!

And then this morning...I had an encounter during the midst of this saga of searching which truly lifted the spiritual fog which had settled in over me. Basically, I had a conversation with a couple of leaders/pastors in which my dream model of youth ministry was being articulated without me having to say a word. I'm just literally speechless about it right now and waiting for the divine nod, nudge, no, or whatever!