I've had the recent humbling (and humiliating) experience of discovering some seriously flawed theology at work in my life. It basically boils down to the way in which I have tried to discern God's will and guidance for the past few years...perhaps even longer!
The interesting thing is that I've coached and encouraged others to do this stuff the right way, and then somehow blinded myself to my own misapplication of prayer and scripture.
The key realization in all of this comes from John 15 and Jesus' whole 'vine' discourse. Jesus says, "Apart from me you can do nothing." My practice of late has been to figure things out and develop my own solution for our difficulties and then proceed on that logic and analysis until God either blesses it or shuts a door or otherwise makes something clear. Apparently, you can't find that approach in Scripture anywhere.
So I need to be broken and brought to the brink so that I can relearn the art of trusting and waiting. My approach hasn't been working all that well for us, so why not try something different...like allowing God to take the initiative and then I'll follow Him?! Let's see how that works for the next ten years or so.
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