Psalm 25

To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul;
in you I trust, O my God.
Do not let me be put to shame,
nor let my enemies triumph over me.
No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame,
but they will be put to shame who are treacherous without excuse.

Show me your ways, O LORD,
teach me your paths



I've been bombarded with songs, scriptures, e-mails, podcast sermons, etc on trust this week. In a sermon on trust from Rick McKinley at Imago Dei in Portland, he pointed out the most common "do not" command in the Bible. More than any other command in the Scriptures is this one: "Do not be afraid." And in the particular text Rick was teaching from, it was in the context of "do not be afraid for I am with you." A little later in the story (of Abraham) God reassured Abe with these words, "For I am your shield, and I am your reward."

As I think back on my post about being angry, I have realized in the past few days that most of my anger is really directed at myself. And all the anger I've been sensing is simmering in a soup of fear. I'm afraid for my family...afraid financially...afraid for my marriage...afraid for my career...afraid of my calling...and the list could go on. But a little light has begun to flicker...a spark of hope...in God. Although I've recently told many that I don't feel inclined to trust God right now...what options am I faced with?

Part of the reason I've felt distrust towards God is due to what I have perceived as a lack of reward...or the lack of God "coming through" for us in difficult times. But I have certainly not been focused on God himself as my reward. The reward and provision has not come as I was hoping or expecting. Again, will I ever learn that God is more concerned with relationship than anything else?!

So perhaps a corner is being turned. I am taking steps to re-place my hope and trust in God. I want to re-align my will with His and agree that ease of life or material blessing is not the reward, but a deeper and more authentic intimacy with the Father...that's what we're after. I'm sure that as I get my mind off of myself...it will improve all of my relationships as well...not just the human-divine one.