My Cycle of Discontent

A couple of days ago, I was fortunate to spend some time with my best buds from Columbus. I knew I needed to get away for a day or so and talk some things over with those who have known me best for the longest time (besides my brothers...the next get-a-way will be to Indy!)

Unfortunately, the discussion about all things spiritual, emotional, marital, vocational, and trivial regarding my life revealed a seriously flawed common thread running through the fabric of my recent and not-so-recent past. Discontentment...it plagues me. There are hints of it throughout my late adolescence and early adulthood. But the most obvious instances began cropping up towards the end of our time in Westerville. And now I find myself in a pattern of seasonal contentment which only lasts a few months before this primal desire to flee emerges once again.

And the real problem is not knowing the source of this discontentment. Is it primarily a spiritual problem? Do I just need to pull up the spiritual bootstraps and 'get over it?!' Or is it vocational? Is it marital? Does it have to do with my calling? Am I being disobedient by not serving in some official pastoral role? Is it just a by-product of living with your in-laws and hoping the pieces of your life fall back into place within the next 9 or 10 months? I really don't know the cause or root problem.

I just had to delete a whole big paragraph because it just degenerated into whining and a gripe session. I'll try to spare you all of anymore of that stuff. Speaking of whining...my girls are terrible at bedtime! They're incredible cute and sweet the other 12-16 hours of the day. But if there's anything to worry or cry about at bedtime...my 7 and 3 year old girls are all over it. Jess and I did have a great daddy-daughter bowling date this morning though. Precious moments, eh?!