An encouraging phone call came from my district manager at Starbucks today. I've been offered a position as assistant manager which brings me back to where I left off with Starbucks in Columbus. That's very good news since it means a pay increase and a step closer to getting my own store. I'm really hoping that happens by the end of next summer. I'll try to be a little more patient with the process this time and not bail out when something looks a little "greener." The promotion will take effect in a couple of weeks and most likely mean relocating to a new store. That will mean a bit more of a drive...but the change of scenery will be nice.
Have you ever gotten stuck in the rut of regret?
I'm there.
As I look back and replay the last coupld of years over in my head, I have these massive episodes of "what if?" and "if only..." It makes me sense a connection with those individuals who don't seem able to get beyond something in their past. Typically, I think that happens when people are wronged or victimized in some way...it becomes very difficult to "get over it" and move ahead. For me, it's more of this gnawing sense of how much better our lives (the family) would be had we.... And just to be painfully vulnerable once again (though I often regret that too), I'm holding God mostly responsible. How I begged and prayed for God to give us clear direction and show us some definitive path to follow. All I got was the spiritual version of crickets chirping. So we moved forward with what seemed prudent, spiritual, logical, and the right thing to do. Now I can't seem to deal with how much it sucks. Want to cast doubt on my/our relationship with God at the time as the explanation for the lack of direct communication and guidance? Feel free...but God knows what my heart and motivations have been over the past 15 years! I don't think it's that...I think there's something very sinister going on...and it continues.
Dangit! This post started off so positively too?!
By the way, Brandon...great point about the cup/sleeve thing!
2 comments:
I've been there, Chris. Perseverence is the only answer. It is disheartening when "the heavens seem as brass" when you go seeking wisdom and direction. It is that guilt laden holiness that we've been raised in (not to say that it was done to sabotage, even though that is what it did to nearly a generation . . . ours) that says "God speaks to those He loves and is in relationship with." Which of course casts doubt at our side of the bargain. Personally I have the utmost faith in your desire to be the man that God wants you to be and in the faithfulness of your heart to His. But Satan is sly and brilliant. Always he is the voice that whispers doubt to us. I'll continue to pray on your behalf for wisdom and guidance and discernment.
On the Starbucks front . . . Congratulations!!! It was honestly the best job I ever had and often (oh at least once a week) I wish that I was back managing a store in the city. Oh how much sweeter life was then. But . . . you already covered that "grass is greener" thing. Love you, buddy. Hopefully we can get together soon for a cup.
Sorry to all you starbucks fans. I know they treat their employees well and are making efforts to use more fair trade and all that...
But the fact remains that their coffee is just plain terrible. Over-roasted so it lasts longer, which only makes the bad flavor last longer.
Blech.
A whole generation of people thinking this is good coffee...now that's injustice!
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